This question really meant: How can I orgasm during intercourse and oral sex? Remember that over 50, 60, 70, 80, and 90 – orgasm takes longer, whether you are a man or a woman. Be patient and don’t demand a climax in each sexual jaunt.
As a woman: understand that most women do not orgasm during intercourse. It’s actually very difficult to do in the “missionary” position because the penis does not have direct contact with the clitoris or the “g-spot” (a highly sensitive spot on the back of the pubic bone, just inside the vagina). If you can, try sitting on your partner and using a gentle vibrator. Or, try laying on your side “spoon” style using a vibrator or your fingers on your clitoris.
During oral sex, many women struggle with the “it’s taking too long, and I know he’s getting tired of it” issue. Tell your partner you worry about that, and that you don’t need to orgasm to enjoy it.
As a man, pressure to perform is more of a challenge as men age, than any health or medical condition. Sex is a mind game. Take responsibility to get to a point where you can relax. Redefine what success looks like in sex. Tell your partner that you may take longer to get hard, and you may not “come”. That’s OK. Ask him/her to play with your penis with his/her hands during foreplay, and enjoy the pleasuring.
During oral sex, try to let performance and degree of hardness go. For men over 50 and 60, performance in oral sex is a terrible burden because your partner can see your degree of rigidity. You are not 25. Enjoy the pleasuring.
For both of these situations, the sex rule of 3 applies: communication, communication, communication. Talk to him/her. Tell your partner you feel pressure to orgasm. Start with planning on NOT having an orgasm during sex, just get the feel of new positions and using a vibrator. Then, talk to your partner, again, and update him/her on what felt good. This applies to oral sex as well. Eventually, over time, you will orgasm with your partner, but it has to be at your speed not his/hers.
Sign up here for the 
